Before I say or do anything tonight, I need to clarify something. I like my job, I am not unhappy there, I just feel as if God might be telling me to get something closer to home so I can spend more time with Mason. I was discussing the house that I just LOVE in Center with the City Manager and I was informed that I would probably qualify for a down payment assistance and the first time home buyers program. Wow, do you know how great that would be? To live literally within walking distance of Mason's school and work? Be back in "civilization" again? Center still doesn't have delivery but it has other perks! But on the other hand, I was on the school's website today and was looking at the their job opportunities and found one that just might suit me. I would be off when Mason was off, I would be able to take Mason to school (we would get to sleep TWO EXTRA hours!!!) and pick him up. I wouldn't be rushing from work to get Mason to bring him back into town for practice, meetings and such. I would be driving 1/2 the distance I am driving now to work which means less gas. Speaking of gas, I am so glad I chose not to trade my car in for a SUV....ah it took $48 to fill my lil' ol' bitty car up today and the gas light hadn't come on!! So, I did some figuring and even if I decided to (I am a very cautious person, and I don't do to well with the unknown) start subing at the school the cut in pay would just about equal what I would pay in gas! I just don't want to hurt any one's feelings, and I am so scared to take that leap of faith. I am going to go ahead and fill out the application and call the school and see if the position is still available and go from there. So, all my great prayer warriors thanks so much for your prayers and continue to pray for me as I decide not only my future but Mason's as well. I can't just leap into things without thinking them through because of him (I have always been the cautious type anyway).
I was just reviewing some facebook status updates and came across one Joyce Meyer posted yesterday "If you have been in driver's seat, why not give the wheel to God and enjoy the ride?" Joyce really has a way of hitting home certain points to me. It is really hard for me to give up that control. I am so fully of doubts and worries and what ifs. I do NOT like uncertainty, the confusion. I have discussed this with my mom and she had a valid point. It isn't always about how much money you make, it is about if you will look back in a few years and regret the decision you made. That my friends is where I am at...will I regret my decision?
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